Dyson recently turned two and as if on cue, has started having meltdowns over such transgressions as: Papa eating discarded food from his tray, walking down the steps in front of him, and flushing the toilet.

Other times, the transgressions are unknown to me as he has not developed the verbal communications skills required to articulate his grievances and I have failed to acquire telepathy.

These are indeed trying times, but I take solace in the fact that a human can only scream continuously for so long. He has to take a breath at some point, right? Right?!

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